| How I go about shipping and when you can honestly expect your item. DAY ONE OF SHIPPING- I go to see who has paid for stuff. I get really excited when I see the dollar signs lit up. I dance around the house. I sit down and say okay lets get shipping. I then decide to go do lunch first since I can afford it as I did see some dollar signs lit up. I kiss my paypal card and praise GOD. I then get in the car as there is no time for cooking,I do have to pack stuff. STILL ON DAY ONE- I get home after a lunch which took me three hours. I have to eat AND chat. Thats why we call it doing lunch it is actually a sporting event. I get home and the phone rings and it is Fang. Fang is a buyer who talks to me for three hours plus. I'm really nice to them as they buy alot. At least I do not lie to you. STILL DAY ONE- Fang has now sucked the life from me and I need to relax. Now you know why they are called Fang. Now I have emails to answer and emergencies to handle and that takes up the rest of my day. It is now night time and I go on various excursions,investigations,phone calls,what have you. DAY TWO- I get up with full intentions of packing and shipping. I look again to see who bought what and answer emails. I begin to pack it. Begin to pack means this. I wonder if I shall ever find the stuff and I hang my head in my hands and fear for my life. I notice that someone has bought something I haven't seen in a good three months. Only GOD himself knows where this item is. I move on and make a stiff glass of cherry Koolaid. I ponder life. STILL ON DAY TWO- While in my daze the phone rings again,who could it be? It is Fang again! Fang is having an emergency. They tell me that a demon is in the house and ask me to talk them through it. Can you give me advice they ask? Sure I tell tem,"GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE!" What more can I say? Again I need to get it together and go do lunch. I plan on coming back and making a dent in the shipping. It doesn't go as planned because I forgot that I have another investigation that I can't blow off because it is with the historical society. I love those people. DAY THREE-- the deflated pumkin head private part scratcher comes over. Okay,you know NOTHING is getting done today. He is pure chaos. This guy can talk more then me! Do you people realize the magnatude of that? I mean he could blow up the world. When we used to try and talk it was one always trying to get a word in. Not a match made in Heaven by no means. He begins to tell me about this girl who broke her knee in four places and how her grandmother would not take her to the emergency room. This is the same girl who is dating my son and likes to be shot with paint balls before they make -out. People,this is a very sick world we live in! I tell him to be quiet so I can pack mystuff up. I then see this old guy who lives behind me in his yard. He is not to stable on his feet so I make sure he doesn't fall down and never get up. This takes a long,long,long time. I can almost feel my life passing me. One time he fell down and he was outside for I think two days before anyone found him. Good thing it was summer time. I'm the only young person on my street. Everyone else is old. They like to come out and spy on me too. It's also a strange street. We can run down the road naked in the summer and no one will see us. We do this when the lights go out as we don't want to scare or offend anyone and most of all ourselves. DAY FOUR- Today is the day! It's going to happen and I can feel the magic. I get ready,I have hot tea but then I realize I have to go to Delaware and feed the homeless man Charlie. Look people,it's still only day four! I find a new homeless person and take them home to prepare to give them a home at the local Wal-mart. I do not like Wal-mart but face it,it is great for homeless people and I have been populating them for the last two years with societies discards. Wal-mart has it all. Lawn and garden which is great for sleeping. Bathrooms for washing and a camping section for God Forbid,procreating in private,tents you know! STILL DAY FOUR- Back from Walmart and again the phone rings. Low and Behold it is a buyer asking where the item is. You can hear a pin drop............... I uh did not do it yet. How long has it been? Your kidding me! Really ! No way! I then try like heck to not laugh what is left of my mind out my ears. The audacity! The NERVE! I see it has only been a week! What MUST they have been thinking? DAY FIVE AND THE BOTTOM LINE- It will get to you. I promise it will. It always does. AND if it doesn't I have been known to find things a good year later. The year thing was only one time so do not worry. So please just relax. I never bug anyone for payments unless I do not know you. If your a buyer for a long time as 90 percent of you are,you already know this. This is for the few new people who think I ship as soon as you pay,I don't and I can't. if you need an item as soon as you win it or pay for it, as much as I want your business I will have to pass. Please do not bid if you can't wait 7 to 8 days for me to BEGIN shipping. Then you get it about 2 two 4 days after depending on where you live. I honestly just can't do it any faster. |
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