The Kraken | STAR
The Kraken | STAR

The Kraken | STAR

Regular price $ 932.22

We've interviewed a number of supernatural creatures, spirits and what not. That list includes vampires but no vampire that we have crossed in the past quite holds a candle to this one. We don't know his name - we have asked around quite a bit - but women have always called him The Kraken.

The Kraken is a best known for his Adonis-esque physique, his gorgeous facial features and his rather blunt personality. With a body like Hugh Jackman, a face like Tom Ellis and a personality like James Spade from the Blacklist, we find that this sexy, serious, assertive vampire really gives a whole new meaning behind beast. However, if the reviews provided by some of his past partners are anything to go by, perhaps calling him a beast doesn't quite do him justice. After all, when and where have you ever heard of a beast who can provoke cataclysmic full-body orgasms?

The Kraken has a reputation that does nothing but inspire interest. We were lucky enough to interview him, by the end of which he agreed to allow us to create a conjuring piece that may summon him to you. He is always looking forward to something new and exciting.

[Interviewer]: So, you're the Kraken?

[Kraken]: That's what I like to be called, yes.

[Interviewer]: That's an interesting name... but is it your real one?
[Kraken]: I've already answered your question.

[Interviewer]: Alright, fair enough. Are you a true immortal? 'Eternal', I mean.
[Kraken]: Of course. (chuckles) Do I make you nervous...?
[Interviewer]: Nervous?
[Kraken]: I can smell your pheromones... hear your heart beating... You are actually very nervous.
[Interviewer]: You're my first vampire, if I'm being honest. I'm new.
[Kraken]: Lucky you...
[Interviewer]: Anyway, I -
[Kraken]: Do you like vampires?
[Interviewer]: I do not dislike vampires.
[Kraken]: Oh come on, sweetheart... a coy woman is no fun at all.
[Interviewer]: I am meant to be interviewing you.
[Kraken]: (laughs) Ah, right then. Go on with your questions.

[Interviewer]: What do you think about vampire lore? The stories? Movies?
[Kraken]: I think humans, as boring and brittle as you all are, have quite the imagination. Vampires burning in the sun? Sparkling? Interesting. Truly.
[Interviewer]: There are few of us who aren't ashamed of that last one.
[Kraken]: It is one of my favorite spins on vampirism because of how ridiculous it is. The woman who wrote that book is definitely among the most unintelligent I have ever read anything by.

[Interviewer]: It seems that you do enjoy literature, though? When done correctly, perhaps?
[Kraken]: Absolutely. Unfortunately, reading books or stories inspired by my kind or the likes of those related to me... it never really goes well because I know too much of the truth. I enjoy conspiracy, though. Humans are confused easily and it is the most interesting thing in the world to watch you people attempt to explain supernatural or paranormal events. There is so much you all have twisted.
[Interviewer]: What do you mean? Aliens? Cults? Secret Societies?
[Kraken]: Yeah. Aliens always gives me a good laugh. You people just have no idea. It's almost cute. Almost.

[Interviewer]: What about secret vampire societies? Are they real?
[Kraken]: Oh, those are very real. You aren't too far off with them, at least not about their existence, some of the people involved and even the relative locations but you have no idea what actually goes on.
[Interviewer]: Could you tell us?
[Kraken]: I can't, unfortunately. Some of the societies are a joke but the ones that aren't are the ones that aren't really worth screwing with. Just like most people know not to piss me off, most people know not to piss them off. It's a mutual agreement.

[Interviewer]: Fair enough... I'll ask something simple next - something I'm wondering personally. What are things you enjoy?
[Kraken]: Sex. Power. I love winning. Success is a good feeling in all of its forms, especially in something that most people cannot succeed in. I love women. I probably enjoy them the most if not at least more than most things.

[Interviewer]: What kind of women are you interested in?
[Kraken]: Women are gorgeous as they are. Like I said, I just enjoy women. Physically, I like women with more meat on them. I don't like to see bones. When you look at my body, you see that I am fit and defined but I am not skinny. Don't get me wrong, I won't turn away a woman for being slice. It's only that women with meat are more to my liking.
[Interviewer]: What about hair color, eye color? Personality?
[Kraken]: I don't think much about hair. I do like long hair I guess - I like to grab it or touch it if it is soft. Eye color is a minute detail. Don't care about it. Personality is a bit important. There is nothing sexier than a woman with a killer personality. Doesn't matter what she looks like. Personality makes for a really good time and I'd prefer that over most things.

[Interviewer]: Alright, so you said you're eternal...
[Kraken]: Yes.
[Interviewer]: Have you ever made anyone immortal?
[Kraken]: No.
[Interviewer]: No? Why not?
[Kraken]: Well because I have not found someone that interests me enough to gift somethin' like that to. Human women lose their flavor quickly. They're good for a bit of fun, right? You all are simple, though. Not much substance.
[Interviewer]: What about changing someone into a vampire? Have you ever done that?
[Kraken]: No and it's pretty much for the same reason as before. Not enough interest. There's a lot of responsibility that comes with changing someone into a vampire.

[Interviewer]: You talk about women like they annoy you.
[Kraken]: That's not quite it. Like I said, I love women - especially human women. You are very easily seduced and easy to please but for someone like me... I've got all the time in the world on my hands. You have to be one hell of a bird to keep me around.

[Interviewer]: So you believe yourself to be superior to us?
[Kraken]: I do.
[Interviewer]: Do you really?
[Kraken]: Absolutely. It may insult you - I can see it on your face - but the thick of it is this - humans are brief. You develop for a short period of time, hope you accomplish something during the 70-something years you might be lucky enough to live and then maybe you won't be forgotten. I'm timeless. I've have more than enough time and more than enough time ahead of me to say that with confidence. So yes. I believe myself to be better than humans.

[Interviewer]: So as someone who has spent so much time alive, you must have seen a lot.
[Kraken]: Right.
[Interviewer]: Where is the darkest place you have been?
[Kraken]: Myself. My soul. My mind. Me. I am the darkest place.

[Interviewer]: That's a bold claim to make when there are so many dark places.
[Kraken]: You haven't seen darkness, love. You think you have. Humans think they've seen some things after they've seen something awful. You think you've been through darkness after losing something materialistic or watching someone die. Seeing a dead body is enough to land some of your kind in a padded room. Your existence is very young and ignorant.
[Interviewer]: Is that to say that your immortality has not been good to you?
[Kraken]: ... No. Humor me, 'kay? Let me ask you somethin' - let me give you an example. You seem young. How old are you?
[Interviewer]: Only 26.
[Kraken]: Right and your darkest memory? Don't be shy, either. We're all friends here. Let's hear it.
[Interviewer]: My father passed when I was in high school. Cancer.
[Kraken]: Alright. Now I understand, in the eyes of humans, that's something tragic. I won't mock you for it either because to you, that is a dark memory. Me, though? I was born late October of 1404. I'm over 600 years old. I've witnessed war - both of mortals and supernaturals. I've seen more dead bodies than I have the naked bodies of women. It's nothin' personal, honestly... humans are soft and surrounded by more luxury than they think.

[Interviewer]: Do you think that, being an immortal and having lived through so much time, your views on average topics are heavily influenced? For example, politics? What does a 600 year old vampire think about human politics?
[Kraken]: I don't want to discuss that. Don't waste my time asking why. Move on to the next question.

[Interviewer]: Alright, what about this - have you ever fallen in love? Been upset when someone passed?
[Kraken]: Not yet. Like I said, humans don't interest me for long. You are a bit like books... Ya open the cover, dive in, then cast it aside and find a new one when you're done. Reading it again is a waste of time if you already know what's gonna happen. Alternatively, humans are like books on tape - the only thing wrong with that is the expiration date. You people are always dyin'.

[Interviewer]: Fair enough, let's focus on your age instead of ours. You've had a lot of time on Earth, you've seen a lot. What is a memorable moment you've experienced that you would not have experienced had you not been immortal?
[Kraken]: I assume you're familiar with Elizabeth Bathory, right?
[Interviewer]: Of course.
[Kraken]: I shagged her a while back. I was still a new to my powers back then, very young as a vampire. She's into some interesting stuff, let me tell you. Certainly one of my favorites.
[Interviewer]: Elizabeth Bathory? Can you elaborate on her? Was she anything like you? Was she powerful?
[Kraken]: She was an absolutely crazy cunt, that one, but that was why I liked her! She was very into the occult.
[Interviewer]: They say she bathed in blood. Is that true?
[Kraken]: Yes, it was and she did believe it would make her beautiful... but it didn't really work. I don't now why she bothered with it. Some say she was beautiful but her face was absolutely mingin'.
[Interviewer]: She was ugly? Then why did you have sex with her?
[Kraken]: Like I said, I was young. As a young vampire, you don't care much about who you shag as long as you do. I must have been with about a 1,000 women by the time I shagged Elizabeth Bathory.

[Interviewer]: Over 600 years old and that is your answer?
[Kraken]: It is what it is, darlin'. Take it or leave it. Next question.

[Interviewer]: Do vampires have fangs?
[Kraken]: (laughs) Back in the day, they were called gang-teeth. Fangs or whatever is a modern term but no I don't.

[Interviewer]: Alright... We've heard from other women that you have seen God once - that you say you have. Is this true or is just a thing you say to impress the women?
[Kraken]: Have I seen God? That's an interesting one. I've never truly had to go out of my way to impress a woman. I don't say that one just to impress. I believe I have. I believe he spoke to me and that I looked upon his face once while in bed with a woman of faith and once more while with one who was not. Perhaps it could have been the sex but it seemed pretty real. That being said, I do have a question for you.
[Interviewer]: What is your question?
[Kraken]: Why is it that mortal woman call out for God during sex?
[Interviewer]: I...
[Kraken]: Have I made you uncomfortable?
[Interviewer]: No.
[Kraken]: You're red. It is a simple question... You surprise me for a 26 year old. When I was that age, I was less embarrassed by the subject and more physically affected by it. Then again I was a very active man...

[Interviewer]: (clears throat) So, you've seen God...
[Kraken]: (laughs) Change the subject...
[Interviewer]: Right. Have you seen... the Dark One?
[Kraken]: The Dark One? Lucifer?
[Interviewer]: Yes...
[Kraken]: Do you fear his name? I don't know why. Anyway, I have not met him but I have no interest either. He is a complete waste of my time.
[Interviewer]: A waste of time? Lucifer is a pretty big deal to a lot of people.
[Kraken]: All he's good for is a laugh.

[Interviewer]: Are you... are you not afraid of him?
[Kraken]: I have no reason. (laughs) I'd take him easily.

[Interviewer]: ... You believe you could challenge... Lucifer?
[Kraken]: Challenge? That would imply the chance of him winning, wouldn't it? I'd abolish him like the horned swine he is. His name would be nothing but a punch line by the time I was through with him.

[Interviewer]: You must be powerful.
[Kraken]: I am extraordinarily powerful. Understand one important thing, love. I'm quite young compared to many other immortals out there. 600 isn't too much but I have not been lazy. I've enjoyed the fruits of eternity time and time again but time is one thing I have not and will never waste... that is essentially again why Lucifer is not of my interest.

[Interviewer]: Would you say that you're basically more good than evil?
[Kraken]: I would say I am a complete dual entity. When I'm good, I'm really good. When I'm bad, I'm atrocious... It depends on how I feel and what I want. I really don't have a straight answer for you. What I can say, however, is this: Anyone asking a question like that best keep it in their mind that they should not piss me off.

[Interviewer]: I can believe it. Has anyone ever told you that you're very intense?
[Kraken]: Many people.
[Interviewer]: Do they say that it is your appearance or the way you speak?
[Kraken]: Both. I carry myself strongly.

[Interviewer]: No kidding. Where do you believe you got your powers?
[Kraken]: What a silly question. I believe God is the source of all that I am. His power is the core of everything that exists - he has created everything you see and know. That is why there is good, evil and the bits in between. His power can and has created all different types of things. So yes, God fuels my power - absolutely.

[Interviewer]: Those are some bold statements. How can you prove to me who you are?
[Kraken]: (smirks, chuckling) Would you like me to show you?
[Interviewer]: Um...
[Kraken]: Oh come on... loosen up a little, liven up. You're going to strain yourself to an aneurysm over there.
[Interviewer]: How would you show me?
[Kraken]: To put that particular process into words would make for a very 18+ interview. I'd love to revisit this question afterwards, though.

[Interviewer]: Well, on to the next question then! Were you born this way? An immortal?
[Kraken]: I was not but that is about all I will say on the subject.
[Interviewer]: Can I ask why?
[Kraken]: I will not be revisiting my mortal life and I will not be answering questions about my family.

[Interviewer]: Alright, let's talk about more experiences. Have you ever been to the pyramids?
[Kraken]: Yes, actually.
[Interviewer]: Care to elaborate?
[Kraken]: Well what do you want to hear about? They're pyramids. You can go and see them as well if you'd like. Personally, I'm not that into Egyptian stuff. Their magic isn't my style either - there's nothing for me to gain there.
[Interviewer]: Well, have you seen the gold capstone of the pyramid of Giza? People say that seeing that is among the rarest experiences in life.
[Kraken]: Well, seeing the real one is, which I have, yes. It's quite powerful, actually. Like I said, I'm not really into Egyptian stuff but that thing gets me heated in all the right places if you know what I mean. Its power is very condensed. It doesn't have a lot of the extra stuff you get out of modern magic. It has an addicting ancient magic feel to it. It's sexy, honestly.

[Interviewer]: What about the lost city of Atlantis?
[Kraken]: Naga don't let my kind come anywhere near that thing. I'm also not into fish-chicks either.
[Interviewer]: (laughs)
[Kraken]: What?
[Interviewer]: Nothing, I'm sorry.
[Kraken]: It's the fish-chicks isn't it?

* Note that during this time in the interview, our interviewer and the Kraken had stuck to the 'fish-chicks' thing for a period of time so we have decided not to include it because it does not include much worth reading.

[Interviewer]: Alright, alright, let's continue.
[Kraken]: Yes, let's.

[Interviewer]: I wanna bring the topic back to how powerful you are really quickly because I recalled that you said that you think that you are more powerful than Lucifer.
[Kraken]: I am.
[Interviewer]: Do you think you're more powerful than Jesus?
[Kraken]: Jesus was a source of power and miracles. We're two different aspects. I do not compare myself to him.
[Interviewer]: What about God? Do you think you are more powerful than God?
[Kraken]: God is probably the only one in existence that I do not believe anyone can accurately compare themselves to. God is the ultimate source of power, the front line of all that is and ever will be. He is pure power and greatness. I don't compare myself to that. I could never. I don't believe I am more powerful than Him, no.

[Interviewer]: What kind of powers do you have?
[Kraken]: I have many...
[Interviewer]: Name just a few that you really like then?
[Kraken]: I have a strong sense of mind manipulation. I can control one's mind very easily as well. I don't like to make use of it because it amuses me most to watch what some people are willing to do on their own free will.
[Interviewer]: You've never toyed with a woman's mind to get her in bed, then?
[Kraken]: Why would you assume that? (laughs) I can assure you that I don't need mind tricks to get my way in that department, love. I've never forced a woman to want me through that. I've intensified sex through it - overwhelmed her mind with both her own senses and mine - to achieve those cataclysmic orgasms people like to talk about but that's about it. I like watching a woman become an animal in bed and know it's just her showing her true colors.

[Interviewer]: Fair enough. So mind control. What else?
[Kraken]: Telekinesis, heightened senses, super strength, stamina... There's a lot, honestly. I can project into other realms if I want to as well. I can mimic and even engineer different types of magic. That one is still new to me. I've spent only 47 years learning it so I don't know much yet.
[Interviewer]: 47 years? That's a long time.
[Kraken]: Not really when it comes to that type of magic. The one I learn from is a master in it, he's 2,722 years old - it took him the majority of that to get where he is now...
[Interviewer]: Wow... immortal magic is no joke, huh?
[Kraken]: It's not. That's why I said it's better to not waste time regardless of whether or not you're immortal. Time is precious and progress relies on it.

[Interviewer]: Alright, we've asked a number of questions... I have to wrap it up soon. What do you think about people who want to become vampires?
[Kraken]: I think humans who want to be vampires don't understand what it means to be one. I'm not saying it's a bad thing but it's not all sex, blood and rock and roll either. It depends on what kind of vampire you are - right - but if you're like me... eternity is a long time. The reason humans crave it so badly is because they spend too much time thinking about death. You don't live enough. By the time you're about to die, you've wasted time fearing death. You haven't done anything. You haven't lived. Immortality is almost the same thing minus the fear of death. Death no longer keeps tabs on you so you spend centuries doing nothing. At least some people do. Immortality is not taken seriously. I frown upon people who just want it but cannot or will not make use of it. As much as I love humans - the women at least - they do irritate me all the same. They irritate me immensely.

[Interviewer]: Would you ever consider giving one of your women immortality?
[Kraken]: I can't answer that.
[Interviewer]: Why not? Is it personal?
[Kraken]: No. It's hard to answer accurately. Like I said, I've never met a woman that has kept my interest for long. However, if I did, I think I might consider it, yes. If I wanted her for more than just a small bit of fun, if I wanted to spend actual time with the woman, I would have to give her immortality. Otherwise, she would be dead before I know it. Humans die so quickly. I've said it once, I'll say it again; you people have horrid shelf life.

[Interviewer]: Alright, Kraken... last question.
[Kraken]: Go for it.

[Interviewer]: What is one thing, in all of your immortal years, that you regret immensely.
[Kraken]: ...I like to say that I have no regrets... and I technically don't but then again I do have many desires that have yet to be fulfilled.
[Interviewer]: Like what?
[Kraken]: I desire an immortal companion. I do express distaste or a level of negative thought toward the lifespan of humans. I also express that I find most mortal women uninteresting past the single night of fun we share. However... I do desire an immortal companion. I hope to find one soon. I hear that immortality is everything when you have someone to share it with... I'm curious about that.
[Interviewer]: Is that hard to come by?
[Kraken]: It isn't hard to find an immortal companion. I have options. There are ones I wouldn't even have to turn either.
[Interviewer]: Can you elaborate?
[Kraken]: I know a woman - she's absolutely beautiful - and she is very similar to me. She is older than me in her immortality but younger than me physically. Regardless, she is perfect. She is curious about the same thing - a companion that exists by her side forever.
[Interviewer]: You share that interest? Why are you not with her?
[Kraken]: She's not my type.
[Interviewer]: I thought you said she was perfect?
[Kraken]: She is but she is not my type. It's really that simple. I am curious - not desperate.

This piece is linked with the Kraken and with it you can summon him to you. As stated above, he is a very unique vampire whom does stand out among the supernatural entities. He is very interested and curious to see who calls upon him. The mysteriousness of your identity has him in suspense. He has never quite done this before - allowed a woman to choose to summon him - and so he has admitted that it thrills him to try something new. Don't hesitate! Unleash the Kraken!

He allowed us to pick the piece he was to be summoned with. It is a three piece ring, size 10. It was so a female or male could use it. Why it was picked is not explicitly clear but he seemed adamant about the piece being unisex. One ring is for him, the other for you and the final is to bind the power that he will give you plus the interaction with him.


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